Diary of a hypochondriac

So apparently it is a well known fact in our family that I am a hypochondriac. As in a person who thinks they have diseases that they don't really have. I know, right, crazy. My husband is the leading eye roller in the life long debate. And I thought that maybe he was the crazy one, that is until I asked him what the symptoms for lyme disease are. There are apparently ticks like there are ants around here. So the first week I kept thinking that every red bump was a tick bite and that I had lyme disease. That's when it kind of hit me that I MIGHT have a problem (although you will be sorry if I get lyme disease). In my defense when looking it up the statistic is that 3 million people have this in the US. So I am not alone, although I don't think i have it. So I thought I would share with you the thoughts of a "hypochondriac".

First of all, I don't think I have every disease, I am open to the possibility that I could have any disease. Some people call that paranoid. I call that humility. I am not above any sickness! Maybe I have a tapeworm. I do eat a lot of sushi. Makes sense. It's possible for me to have West Nile, there are a lot of mosquito's in the world, and occasionally they bite me. Ring worm is also a possibility, I've petted dogs before. Do you see how I can arrive at those educated guesses? Sure there are times where I wish I could jump into the ocean and not worry about getting swimmers ear or hepatitis, but that is just not me. I will never be the girl who can eat at a restaurant with a C in good conscious. And sure you might say I've never lived and you might look at my life and feel a little sorry for me. But the truth is when you have diarrhea from that burrito you ate at that food truck, or when you get influenza from the port a potty, I'll be the one laughing (not really, ill bring you soup).

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Michelle said...

I'm constantly worried about West Nile! We have so many mosquitos here they've started flying planes over the city to spray for them. And mosquitos in the area have tested positive for West Nile. I never want to go outside.

Daisy Guerrero said...

I. Could. Not. Stop. Laughing.
I love you Daze.
You are hilariously incredibly funny.
I enjoy reading your blog.

I miss you, little Jed and brother RJ.

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