All the single ladies


I'm not sure how many times I've heard my single friends make a reference to their loneliness and lack of a love life. I don't know how many times I've said it's not a bad thing to be single which is usually met with eyes rolling. Understandably so, I've had a boyfriend for as long as I can remember, and I met RJ when I was 14. We got married when I was 22, and I had Jed at 23. What do I know about singleness? Maybe not a whole lot, but I can tell you what I know about being hitched to someone else's wagon (yea, I said that). I'll splain....
I will start off by saying that I LOVE my family! This is not a cautionary tale on why not to get married or have a family. Some of you might take it that way (and that's ok). I didn't choose the family life; the family life chose me. That sounds so much better the other way (which also applies to me), so here it is.
     I wake up every morning feeling like Lois Wilkerson. Grab a bottle and a burp cloth, and I'm ready to crush this feeding.  I have genuisly(?) changed  the lyrics to more accurately reflect my life, because I do not in fact wake up feeling like P. Diddy. I don't even wake up on my own. My alarm is a screaming hungry baby, and a toddler who wants to go downstairs and have cereal. My husband walks in the door from his workout, and I start making breakfast, all while looking like Matthew Perry (post friends). We all have breakfast, then I start making his lunch, and he's off to work. I throw some laundry in the machine, clean up a little, and start playing blocks with my three year old. The baby wakes up. It's time for another feeding and diaper change. He's awake, and he wants to be held. We play, laugh, snack, potty, and fold clothes. The baby is sleeping, and  Jed wants to see the iPad. I say, " No." He has a meltdown, and the baby is awake again. I rock the baby back to sleep, Jed has come to his senses, and we continue folding clothes. This is followed by more cleaning, dishes, and more crying, myself included. Nap time! My three year old takes a nap, but not without the Nap-Time Routine. The baby wakes up right on schedule. I feed him; we play a little and he's back to sleep. I read, watch Netflix, or blog, but usually fall asleep. I wake up to a hungry Jed, usually he utter the words I'm hungry about 10x. The baby wakes up,  and he's hungry too. I quickly make my son something and feed the baby. I put some cartoons on, and all is quiet for about 20 minutes, which I usually waste online. I clean some more, we play with toys, all while still looking like Matt Perry. It's time to start dinner! Hey! My three year old wants to help! Oh, look! He spilled rice on the floor. Husband is home, and we have dinner. I might take a shower. Then, we all usually hang out together in some way. Jed gets a bath, and goes to bed. We usually watch TV (still feeding the baby in between). Sometimes we're in bed by 9pm!!! And by we, I mean my husband, because I'm up with the baby until he decides he's finally going to sleep through the night. And we do this all over again, or at least variations of it. When I'm lucky, we get to leave the house.

 This is my life. I do not get to wake up when I feel like. I rise to the needs of the others. (Sounds really cool when I say it like that) I can't sleep-in. I can't just go to the movies. I can't just buy that really cute outfit because we have to eat and pay bills and other nonsense. I can't talk on the phone for two hours or even thirty minutes because chances are someone is going to want something. I can't do something without thinking about how it will affect my family first. While I really love my family, I wish I would have enjoyed my single life more. I remember that feeling of wanting to get married or have children, and just "wanting my life to start." What I wish my past single self would have understood is that theres a season for everything! Enjoy life right where you are. I'm sure if I live to be 60 I will tell my 30 year old self the same thing. Enjoy the freedom to serve without any distractions. Enjoy being able to get dressed without someone pointing out that you have a belly or eat without someone flinging rice at you, and riding in a cart without listening to the same song 30 (you think I'm kidding). Being married and having kids is really awesome, but so is not having to worry about where you put your gum because someone might eat it. Enjoy where God has you! Don't try to make something happen that isn't right for you. You know what will make your life suck? Choosing something contrary to what God has for you. So while it's not wrong to want to be married and have kids, it's wrong to be discontent. Take advantage of all the opportunities you have to freely serve, give, and get up and go. Although it will be awesome, one day it will take a lot longer to get up and go (2.5 hours to be exact)

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